China, Russia, and Iran Demand Defunding of USMC-Corp Stands Down All Tank Battalions

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ARLINGTON, VA – After demands from China, Russia, and Iran regarding fears of domination the Trump administration ordered the immediate stand down of all United States Marine Corp tank battalions.  “They asked and asked nicely, so we are getting rid of the tanks.”, said the Corps’ Commandant.

For some reason, Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, immediately announced an investigation or foreign collusion between the Trump administration and the countries.  “Why she’s investigating this is insane.  We’ve admitted to doing it at their request.  It’s a unilateral de-escalation.  You know.  Diplomacy.”, responded an anonymous source in the administration.

In a developing story, there is a sudden and inexplicable shortage of crayons in China, Russia, and Iran.