I’m gonna assume you know how a crossword puzzle works. I’m gonna assume if you live in Allendale you’ll get this. I’m gonna assume if you don’t live in Allendale you might realize how petty we can be.

Across
7) Something parents bitch about because they’ve been locked in their homes.
9) What you need when you need a body disposed of, or a new deck built.
10) What Allendalians consider an air plane following all applicable federal aviation codes.
Down
1) What to eat when you can’t find wild grapes.
2) Word that doesn’t mean what you think it means.
3) Phrase that intentionally doesn’t work in the Allendale Informed search bar.
4) Not a suitable option for dinner when the line is wrapped around Culver’s.
5) Evil corporate entity that you willingly give money to.
6) Thing by Taco Bell you can’t order, but you can.
8) What people will do with you when you call out their bull shit on Allendale Informed, or recycling now.
11) Who to call when you are blown off by the OCSD.
Across
7) Something parents bitch about because they’ve been locked in their homes. [BUSSCHEDULE]
9) What you need when you need a body disposed of, or a new deck built. [CONTRACTOR]
10) What Allendalians consider an air plane following all applicable federal aviation codes. [LOWFLYING]
Down
1) What to eat when you can’t find wild grapes. [POISONBERRY]
2) Word that doesn’t mean what you think it means. [REDUNDANT]
3) Phrase that intentionally doesn’t work in the Allendale Informed search bar. [IPHONESCREEN]
4) Not a suitable option for dinner when the line is wrapped around Culver’s [BABYBUNNY]
5) Evil corporate entity that you willingly give money to. [TACOBELL]
6) Thing by Taco Bell you can’t order, but you can. [QUESARITO]
8) What people will do with you when you call out their bull shit on Allendale Informed. [SCRAP]
11) Who to call when you are blown off by the OCSD. [FAA]
Jonathan is a degreed physicist and engineer by day, and amateur entertainer in the evenings. He enjoys studying and performing improvised comedy and writing sketch comedy. When he’s had enough of listening to people complain, you can find him underwater scuba diving where he can’t hear you. It’s like space. No one can hear you, but not because of a vacuum. No. It’s because you can’t talk. So it’s like space, but without the radiation and deadly aliens that burst out of your chest.