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Love Letters and a Prohibition for the Poet Laureate

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The letters shed contain details of Eliot's personal life, opinions of the literary community, his career, and a final instruction to his estate. A surprising letter with a prophetic warning:

Top Five Things to Say to Your In-Laws on Thanksgiving

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Top 5 List
After you put it in, how long will it take?If I don't unbutton my pants I'll explode!Does it always pop up so fast?Sucking the nitrous out of the whipped cream is how I tolerate you. Did I say that out loud?I didn't expect this. You all came at once.

Advice: Ask a Playbill Bio

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Dear Playbill Bio, I really love smoking weed. I want...

Top Five Commandments for Texting

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Top 5 List
Everything you wanted to know about texting but were afraid to ask.

The Allendale Trail

Childhood memories of fording a river, broken wagon yokes, and dying of dysentery.

Federal Employees Nearly Riot in Back to Work Shopping

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WASHINGTON DC – It was the most wonderful time of the year for teen aged children across the United States on Monday morning this week.  Thousands of furloughed non-essential government employees returned to work and permitted their high-school children to have the house to themselves for those precious 3 hours every weekday afternoon. Jan Johnson, teen daughter of a TSA employee,...

S.T.E.M. is Out – Applied Social Outrage is In

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BERKLEY, CA – The University of California, Berkley, announced today a new program of study in its College of Letters and Sciences: Applied Social Outrage.  The new UC Berkley major will provide young privileged middle-class students with a method and focus for their outrage. “Our advantaged youth are becoming more and more agitated over issues that matter to them instead of...

The US Government – It’s Back for a Limited Time Only

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WASHINGTON D.C. - Last Friday, the 25th of January, congress and the president came to an agreement and decided to open the federal government for a limited time only. That's right, unless congress and the president can come to an agreement on border security, the federal government will again, be put into cold storage. This isn't a new tactic....

Checkpoint Allendale

Papers please. You are about to enter the democratic socialist republic of my yard.

Allendale After Dark Vol. 6 Ep. 01

In which we are welcomed to The Great White North...