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Loss of a Great American Hero

May you forever make little fists with your toes.

Canadians Stockpile Gin Like Americans Stockpile Guns

Bombay Sapphire Co. announced a recall on thousands of bottles of gin across Canada, and  the bottles are flying off the shelves faster than guns after the election of a Democrat President in the here United States.  The gin's alcohol content is reported to be near 77% vs. the 40% on the label.  Though Canadians are known for their...

The Silver Lining

Congress is investigating a reduction in limits on 401(k) retirement contributions as a possible funding source for revenue to finance tax cuts. Fortunately, reduced access to universal health care reduce the need for retirement savings as life expectancy drops off.

The Running Man

The US Government placed several prototypes for a border wall on display in San Diego this week.  They also announced a sponsorship with NBCs American Ninja Warrior Challenge to help fund the wall that Mexico will be paying for and have begun a talent search for a Richard Dawson look-a-like as a spokesperson.

I Only Buy It for the Articles

The 1992 law requiring the National Archives to release of thousands of pages of previously classified material related to the assassination of President John F. Kennedy went into effect today.  Public response was minimal and without excitement.  Most Americans are waiting for the TMZ followup release, Jack and Marylin visit the Lincoln Bedroom.

Gods Among Mortals

China's Communist Party elevated President Xi Jinping to the same exalted status as the nation's founding father Mao Zedong.  Not to be out done, Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame elevated Katy Perry's Chained to the Rhythm to the same elevated status as The Beatles' Revolution.

Journalism of the Obvious

Today, the New York Times reported that YouTube, "the world's most visited video site", was instrumental in disseminating propaganda and information warfare operations around the world for the Russian Government.  Finally proving that old suspicion that short TV clips have the ability to influence behavior.

Admission of the Obvious

Bill O'Reilly
This week Bill O'Reilly admitted to settling sexual harassment cases with only three women. In other news, the US government admitted to using atomic weapons on only two Japanese cities, Charles Manson admitted to brutally killing only seven people, and the severed preserved head of Adolph Hitler admitted to trying to eliminate only one race during the Holocaust.

NFL Huddles Disappear as Hurry-Up Offenses Emerge

As hurry-up offenses become more common to promote higher scoring games, the iconic fixture of the NFL, the huddle is rapidly disappearing from the gridiron. The only NFL fixture disappearing faster is viewership.