BERKLEY, CA – The University of California, Berkley, announced today a new program of study in its College of Letters and Sciences: Applied Social Outrage. The new UC Berkley major will provide young privileged middle-class students with a method and focus for their outrage.
“Our advantaged youth are becoming more and more agitated over issues that matter to them instead of issues that we deem important.”, said Dean Smithers.
The Student Senate passed a resolution demanding the major as a joke last term, but the resolution quickly support amongst the student body and alumni. Within a couple of weeks, the administration’s hand was forced, and a new department created.
“We saw this as a win-win situation.”, touted Dr. Laurie Jacobs. “The intellectual elite needed a way to mobilize a new generation to fight our battles; the battles that reinforce our position. The students were looking for recognition from the same aristocracy they strive to overthrow. Win-win.”
Enrolment opportunities are limited for the inaugural class. If recent events of protest and resistance are any indication the competition is poised to be fierce. A contentious and entertaining presidential primary runup is coming up next.
Steven Stark is a self educated social commentator, humorist, and contributor. He is currently enjoying partial retirement and acting as editor for The Grand Beacon.